Caryatid Chalice

HARI GRADUASI TINGKATAN 6 ATAS 2009

2009-11-24T19:56:00.002+08:00

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I KNOW I MUST

2009-05-25T08:49:00.005+08:00

I know i must be strong
I know i must be tough
Coz i know that you dont love me the way
You used to be before

I know that this is just
Another broken dream
I may not have you in my arms again
Baby i know i must

Baby tonight is gonna be the night
I'll remember for the rest of my life
Baby its all because of you i know now
That love is so blind

I know i must be strong
I know i must be tough
Baby i know that you just
Don't love me the way you used to be

Coz Baby tonight is gonna be the night
We gonna remember for the rest of our life
I'll not bother anymore or your love

Baby tonight...
I'll remember for the rest of my life
And its all because of you
I'll have to move on....

**(incomplete version, will upload again sometimes)

Poem for sister Zuraidah

2009-05-25T08:15:00.005+08:00

HOW DOES IT FEEL TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING
BUT DOESN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO
HOW DOES IT FEEL TO LEAVE BEHIND EVERYTHING
YOU ONCE KNEW, BUT NOW ITS GONE
HOW DOES IT FEEL, KNOWING THAT TOMORROW IS ANOTHER NEW DAY
HAVING TO ADAPT TO CHANGES
THAT LEADS INTO UNCERTAINTIES AND MILLION OPPORTUNITIES

YET YOU ARE STRONG, BOLD AND COURAGEOUS
TAKE FULL CONTROL OF THIS SHIP OF NEW HOPE
IN FINDING INNER PEACE AND SATISFACTION
WHO HAVE SUCCUMB TO MANY DIFFICULTIES
THEN SHAPING YOU INTO A NOBLE LADY
A FIGURE OF A ROLE MODEL
A WOMAN WITH HIGH DIGNITY
WHO WE PROUD OF AND RESPECT.

WE MANY NOT KNOW WHAT FUTURE HOLD FOR US
WHAT MAY BE OR COULD BE….
BUT WITH ALL OUR HEART WE WISHES YOU GOOD LUCK
SURELY WE WILL MISS YOU
KAK ZU FOR ALL THESE YEARS OF YOUR SACRIFICES.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
TQ

2009-05-03T21:14:00.001+08:00

HE DOESN’T REMEMBER ME TONIGHT

Maybe the best part has passes us
Which we wasted for not knowing when its’ actually gone…
Maybe the Lust just ended
After the session of laughter and joy that now seems bleak

Night after night….
You and I are distance away from phone calls nor meeting up face to face
Unlike those times where we used to spend chatting endlessly regardless
At time we misses each other so much and can’t bear to spend a day away
Those time now has passes us too

Tonight after last night’s fight on phone…
The feeling of unwanted once again knocked at the door
Feeling cold and numb… anticipating of simple messages or short phone call…
Yet, time slipped through and nothing happened, tonight
He doesn’t seems to remember me tonight at all
He doesn’t remember me tonight
What am I suppose to do?

Maybe he doesn’t remember me
Or refused to remember me tonight
Perhaps… tonight is the beginning of another night like this
Until I understand eventually how its will ended
That he will never call me like the night before tonight…
Everything now has vanished into thin air…

NOT YOU NOR HIM

2008-09-08T09:11:00.005+08:00

You….
Are the first who touch my heart and hold its
But keeping it too long through the test of time….
Has finally taking its toll
Never that I whisper the words of hatred because I still love you

Him…..
Suddenly appear in front of me
Fulfilling all my desire but….
The thought of him would change make me sigh
Argh… what a fool would thoughts he would change for me

You…
Should have known better
Taking that chance and opportunity but…
Why letting it go and slips through your hands
Now, I don’t even know where to begin

Him…
Knowing you has taught me of myself
However, I must let go of your hand somehow
Because I can never complete you in mine
Two individual with different passionate

You….
Never easy to say goodbye
After such time passes us by
Yet it you who force me to walk away
Yes… I’ll miss you so,
Yes....i still love you!
But I think you are a fool…

Him…
I’ll walk away in the midst of dust…
When you never even aware or too blind to see
How I’ve change for you
Yes… I started to love you too
Dame!!!… merely words for you
Without any meaning at all

You…
Too busy to realize that I am here for you
Yet, caught up in messy trouble of your own
I can’t help you, I wish I could but I’m helpless too
I’m drowned yet you never catch me either…
Good guy wouldn’t let women waiting too long darling!

Him…
Notice me as only physical
Ignoring my heart almost completely…
But there’s sincerity in your words, I trust you!
Honesty and loyalty, you couldn’t comply that
Good guy wouldn’t let women cry honey!

Silently, my tears falling like rains…
Saying Goodbye
Saying Nothing
Keeping it all inside, no one will ever know
Who I wish for more…
As has it all too late for me?
You make my heart melt each time…
Him make me a better person inside…
I’ll walk away now… with a deep sigh, with a silent cry…
Two guys who think they are good guys
Leaving this heart broken apart
Yet, where do I stood for now?
I promise I’ll go quietly as my heart couldn’t handle it anymore
Better it end at this crossroad
Two men I love them both
The one who hold my heart and…
The one who hold my hand
Make it real or take it all away
If not you or him is going to stay, because…its

Not you nor him

(quote a bit from THE CORSS –DON’T SAY YOU LOVE ME)

MY COLOURS

2008-09-07T16:40:00.001+08:00

GOLDINUNIVERSE

See yourself as others see you...You have always been on the move seeking affectionate, satisfying and harmoniousrelationships. Your ultimate goal has been the realisation of an intimate union in which therecould be love, self-sacrifice and mutual trust. It has often been said that 'True love is justaround the corner' and - if you haven't found it as yet - you possibly soon will.You are inclined to be too trusting and you feel that you need to be on your guard againstthe possibility that your endeavours and actions may be misunderstood. Too often you havebeen taken advantage of and you have been mentally abused. Now you are seeking arelationship which can provide peace of mind, where you can be yourself and not have theneed to put on a false front.You are an emotional, sincere and impressionable individual experiencing frustration andunnecessary stress. You are carried away by other people's enthusiasm and looking for thatidealised relationship, be it in a business or personal situation, which you are able to sharewith a mutual depth of understanding. You have lowered your defences in the past and youhave been hurt, so you are now extremely wary of being exploited. You are still ready totrust people on the condition that they are prepared to offer you proof of their sincerity.You wear your heart on your sleeve and since you are an emotional person you are apt togive your all - heart and soul - to all those that show you a little affection; but take care - itwould appear that you have been extremely hurt in the past and you keep leaving yourselfwide open for punishment.You are trying to improve your position and prestige - be it in your life or in your workplace.Things are, at this time, OK - but they could be better. You feel that it is essential that youbreak down any opposition that could possibly lurk in the shadows. You know that you arequite capable of achieving this set goal because you have to and because it is essential toyour self esteem.

(Can you believe this stuff? check it out...)

LOVE DESERTED ME

2008-08-03T03:44:00.004+08:00

Maybe …..what choices do we have
Fallen in love then fallen apart again and again
Maybe …. What can we do?
You’ve broken this innocence heart
To choose in between TWO HEART…
One must endure the suffering
While the other one leads to happiness!!!!
Whatever choices we made
That will alter our future ahead
I know better now
That love once so strong between us
Love has deserted me
I’m stuck in this vacuum of love
Feeling regret and sorry for myself
Because you have flame up my fire
Yet now, you’re the one that has to lid it off
What the meaning of this?
To feel love and touching it….
In the end
Love deserted me eventually.

LONELINESS KILLED HIM

Do I seem to care what used to be or not?
Do I seem to lose control of what I wanted to become and oevcome?
Do I seem to realize what I’ve lost and gain?
Do I seem to look at life as pretty and beautiful as I seen it when I was a child?
Then why it looks different now?
Can this heart change as time passes us by,
Like wind blowing never came back
Can i forsake this love and cast it away forever?

I can tell you as much as this true….
Once remained this heart so pure and beautiful
Once i have you but you make me a fool
Silent keep a gap so huge
Love destroyed me, ripped my heart apart inside
Loneliness killed a person in me
Or what that used to be of me
And now, look at what has become of me…..

Do I seem to care bout anything?

Hard

2008-07-30T13:36:00.005+08:00

The hardest thing in life

Is to let go and grow

Learning to be free and wise

Letting it all go before old

Reminises the past for a while

Must remember its all over

Even you make mistake of being wild

Forgive yourself and turn over

Consiousness awaken me to be sober

Stand firm on your feet and be braver

Dont give up nor fallen apart

Find peace and tranquility forever

Keeping The Romance Alive(Chapter 1)

2008-07-29T14:17:00.006+08:00

"i'm tired chasing you like a wild goose, go around circling the bushes yet getting nothing in the end, A ..... I dunno what else to do nor to think anymore?! i really am confuse and lost here, whats' wrong with you lately? why i'm not getting the right respond from you? or maybe you grow fed up with me? Tell me now, or i am leaving." Vevina said in sad tone. Darling A just look shocked and quickly replied her by looking directly at her eyes with fierce.

"What are you talking about? You are acting weird lately....i call you and even sent you some messages sometimes, don't you get it? Am i not showing you that i care bout you? Please Don't assumed i'll know what's in your mind if you didn't tell me what bordering you, Vic?" Darling A justifying and stand firm with his point. "I have no time to play around with other girl because i have you, and so far i'm satisfies with you... so honey i have no reason to find someone else." Such a relief to hear that explanation.

"im sorry, i feel insecure when i had no idea of where you are? what you do or even with who you been hanging around? Honestly, i don't want to be your pin in the ass.... or that crazy lady who never stopped till now and still calling you....but at least tell me where you are? Don't you know how my feeling is?? I'm a women A.... of course there's a lot negative things lingering in my mind. I only wanted you to tell me the truth, if you don't like me anymore than it is better for me to walk away.... " With tears flowing from her eyes.

Then he hold her hands and hugging her so tight under his wide arm around her, almost like squeezing her in..... he kisses her forehead and whisper to her....

"If i wanted you to be here right now, it means i only have you in my heart..... so Vic, don't be too emotional o.k?"

Then Darling A look at her eyes... captivated, she just stop crying and smile a bit.... "I'm sorry". He start kissing her red rose bud lips gently, paused and continue kissing her then after sometime its became a bit rough and he pulled her hair and down....

(TO BE CONTINUE.......) 8(:0)

Determination

2008-07-26T10:33:00.007+08:00

Determination

Determination..... could it be just words and how could it be meaningful and so powerful to someone who suddenly get motivated and be inspired.

Determination .... that is what each and every individual needs in their life so that they could walk to the path which they had choosen in order to be among succesful people. "With determination everything is possible and nothing is impossible".

Eventhou we always bow down and submit to failure without even tyring or struggling to fight for what we believe in. Because for some people 'surrender' is easier way rather than put your heart and soul to keep it going.

Yeah... who say that loosing is sweat.... and victory is sour?! But the idea of working hard, very-very hard to achieve the impossible goal seems to be too much to bare. Sometimes... after a while when you are almost get hands on 'victory' suddenly the outcome result is upsetting your heart therefore giving up is a choice you just can't refuse nor deniel as if you have been 'bribe' by it.

2008-07-25T11:53:00.003+08:00

WITHOUT ANY REASON

Why do I still keep questioning you
Unsatisfied without any reason
Why do I turn to be cold and difficult for you?
Unfaithful without any reason
Why do I still wanting and longing for you?Unfairness and threatened by betrayal without reason

Without any reason you left me
Without warning you thrust d knife into me
Without mercy you has betray me
Without compassionate you’ve deserted me
Without any notice you’re leaving me
Without any reason
Without any apparent reason
Yet I failed myself for not seeing what to come.

Now, without any reason you’re here
Near but somehow so far to reached
Why do we need each other?
Yet so difficult to live in with?
Playing this dangerous game
Still why we are together?
No, I don’t understand this…..
I refuse to understand anymore

Without any reason
Please I don’t want to know any reason at all….
Lets say goodbye for no REASON!